MOTHMANICA!!!₍^. .^₎⟆

I did some bad things when I was younger. I regret them, and I punished myself for them, andyes, I mean sh. I used to do it a lot. I've been clean for over three months now. today, I went to the store and bought hair dye with my mom. we went to see a movie and got food. when we got home, I waited for a bit and then she started sectioning out my hair. I asked her "Wait, aren't you dying all of it?" "no:" "Why? dad said I could" "because I said no" "Please?" "no" after a bit, my dad was;ked in and got mad. I asked him why he hadnt talked to her about it like he said he would, and he said hed get around to it. things got heated, and my mother rbough up the things I had done when I was younger. I told her that she clikdnt be talking, since she told me to kill myself oen time. yes, she didn't tell me explicitly, but it was implied. it went something like this - "mom. I just want to kill myself sometimes" "Then be my guest" its been about a year now. during our fight, after I brought it up, she said she hadn't said that. she also said she said sorry. I told her I knew she didn't mean it, and she got mad. she told me that she meant if I as goin to do it, to do the job right because she was tired of deslking with me. this fight was 10 minutes ago. I am NOT doing well. they wouldn't miss me if I was gone, would they? I want to make them feel bad, but I don't want to die. I feel like I have people to live for, but also, the have other people. my friends hev grows distant, leaving me with one friend. she has other friends. she would forget abput Me.

ty @lady_deadpool <3

:P